Depression pt 1

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I am not sure if I have ever blogged on the subject of depression, but it is a very real emotional state that many people face. I am not sure if you’ve ever heard it said that “suicide increases over the holidays” but that is actually not true! The opposite is actually true … “Suicide rates DECREASE over the holidays”. Why?

  • People gathering together with friends and family.
  • Christmas celebrations evoke a sense of hopefulness and a renewed outlook on life.
  • Community awareness of reaching out and loving and caring for hurting people.


I’ve personally never been “depressed”, but I have been tempted to allow feelings of depression to creep in and take over my life… I think most everyone has faced “opportunities” to be depressed.

I have not read anything recently on depression so what I am going to say next is just from my gut … so I hope it can help you (if you are facing feelings of depression) or equip you to help someone you may know facing depression.

I realize there is medical and chemical side to depression that I am not knowledgeable of … though can I say that “food” is a chemical, so I would encourage anyone facing depression to eat healthy. (Like cut out all sugar, junk food and fast food … drink water only and eat lots of veggies!)

I do want to address depression from a spiritual perspective; depression is a feeling, or various feelings of (i.e. loneliness, failure, sadness, pessimism, hopelessness, worthlessness, loss, pain, etc.) and when we give into those feelings (allow them to dictate to us what we will and will not do) we further perpetuate the “feelings” of depression.

This is why I’ve encouraged those who are depressed to get out and do the things they WANT to do but the depression won’t let them do. Many times when someone is depressed they engage in activities that only feed their emotional state of depression, when what they should do is what would feed a positive mental state.

For example when someone is depressed they remove themselves from friends and family, they sleep a lot, watch TV a lot (that in itself is depressing to me!) they don’t get out, and sometimes they don’t clean themselves up … wearing sloppy clothes, and not wearing makeup, etc. Again, these are all things that further FEED the mental state that they want to beat.


*please understand that my heart goes out to those who are facing depression ... I have family members who are facing depression issues ... so I pray you, or those you know facing depression find the answers to make them alive again! I of course believe the answer is found in Christ ... a long with practical (and sometimes medical) things as well.

Feelings follow action … more on that in Depression pt 2

Online Dating

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Jana and I married just after Al Gore created the internet. (Cough, cough …ha ha) So there was no internet dating options available when we were dating, so how we met was the old fashion way (I scratched my name and number in a few women’s bathroom walls at places like Crown Center and Jana called - Lol!)

We didn’t even have a computer until after we were married for a year. Wow, I feel old! (We married in June of 1994).

I do believe that changing times calls for changes in the way we do things … and internet dating is definitely a valuable tool in meeting people and here are some guiding principles you would do well to follow.

I obviously do not have any experience with internet dating, but I do understand people, how relationships work, and love, so I have some insight that should be helpful for those who are in the internet “dating” scene and want to find true love.

1) Find the right site – No all sites are created equal. I have no idea which ones are good, but do your research! Also find one that fits who you are looking for … meaning; if you are a healthy-eating vegetarian, then find an “online dating service” for vegetarians (yes, there are sites that are that specific). There is a site for single farmers looking to meet other single farmers even. So people like that would talk about milking cows and raising chickens in their profile … I am sorry, I just had to say that!

Obviously find a reputable site that doesn’t promote smut! Some internet dating sites seem to be more about helping people find a sex partner then finding true love. Choose wisely!

2) Be HONEST on your profile – and that starts with your picture. Don’t have a picture of you from 20 years ago and 30 pounds lighter. Have a recent picture of yourself … sure have your “best” picture, but don’t doctor it with Photoshop! Secondly, (guys) don’t try and make yourself out to be a rich romantic guru if you are broke and think being romantic means you put on a little English Leather before you take her to McDonalds for a fish Sandwich. That will only lead to problems later … because if that isn’t who you are NOW then it will not be who you are later! BE HONEST! And the same goes for the girls…hear me here, it’s okay to mention your “good qualities”, but don’t inflate yourself to be someone you are not.

3) Be original and creative in your bio - Stay away from saying what everyone else says on their profile … “fun, charming and happy”. Be more descriptive of what a “FUN” day looks like for you, or in what ways are you “charming” and what things make you “happy”.

4) Don’t Settle – When you are dating you can not become desperate because then you “settle” for someone who on a good day you wouldn’t even consider. Be patience!


5) Be yourself – on the first date is the best time to just be you. I am not saying fart and belch, but just be you. Because what you do not want is for the person to fall in love with who you are ACTING like you are, then later they meet the real you and it all crashes … then everyone is hurt!

When I met Jana I, as most do, put my best foot forward … I put on the charm, I was romantic, and I was very complimentary and loving! But here’s the deal… you'll need to keep that up forever and if you do ... wow, you have a marriage most will admire!

Why

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I just want to say THANK YOU for reading my blog! I mean seriously, there are so many blogs out there, I do really appreciate that you take the time to read it, and especially when you make comments! If I am honest, it makes me feel loved!

I’ve never shared WHY I blog … so here it is; I “blog” my thoughts because I think we live in a culture that is trying to make sense of loving Jesus without being weird and hiding out in a little “Christian” subculture. I think you really want to impact this world for good. It’s what Christ has called us to! “Go ye into all the world and make disciples of all nations…” I want to do that, and I believe you do too! But HOW?

I have neighbors, friends, and other Christian people I know who do really love Jesus, but frankly they are weird in the eyes of seekers. I do not mean that as a slam… I promise. It’s just that they are outside the culture completely and are not reaching the lost people who are right around them! And I think this breaks the heart of God honestly! It's like the Bullhorn street evangelist guy I interviewed down in Westport ... he thought what he was doing was great and effective. But we interviewed people who passed by this dude, and they told a different story. They explained that, “if that is what being a Christian is all about … they are not interested!” I don’t blame them!

Notice that scripture says “go INTO…” which is exactly what Jesus did… he left the perfection of Heaven (where they only play “Christian Praise Music”, have “Godtube”, rated “G movies” and only serve “Non-alcoholic Grape Juice” and “Chic Fa La” is the only Fast Food Restaurant), to come “INTO” a broken hurting sin filled world. Jesus did not HIDE from the broken, the hurting and He definitely did not hide from the sinner… actually that was who He spent most His time with (you understand that’s ME and YOU).

I think we Christians think we are “not in that group”, but we are all sinners … even when you find Christ and receive His free gift of salvation, you are still a sinner … hence the reason you and I still sin … we are just SAVED sinners is all.

That is WHY I blog; to communicate this message of hope for all people and to play my small part of Leading People to a Healthy Relationship with Jesus Christ.

Shalom!

Mercy Bowl VI

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What can I say; it feels good to win! 4 to 1 was the final score. Thanks team! Special Thanks to Amit Suri and & Ely Parker for running the show! Much appreciated! All the guys did outstanding! The Defense was great holding the other team to only one run, and the Offense for running some great plays and scoring!

Interesting side note; the team we played plays together all year round ... so for us to have only one practice the week before and win the thing ... is sweet! Lovin-it!

Have a great Thanksgiving!

Leadership Lesson

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I learned a valuable lesson in Leadership Sunday when about 20 guys, and one girl showed up for football practice for the Mercy Bowl VI game we play every year the Sunday before Thanksgiving.

Usually I run the game since I am the QB, well that hasn't always served us well because I never played organized football and really don't know the game all that well. I played Baseball, Tennis and Ping Pong growing up. My typical play call was - "just get open".

So this year I recognized that several guys and even the girl knew way more than me and I would be smart to have them run the show ... so that is what I did! I picked Amit Suri to run the Offense and Ely Parker to run the Defense ... and WOW, what a great practice we had!

I seriously think we are going to pound the church we are playing in the ground and make them cry like little sissy girls ... of course all in a Christian-nice-kind-of-way! Obviously!

Lesson I learned - as a leader, when you have a goal (to win the football game) and you have people who are way smarter and better then you willing to lead ... let them lead. Because then everyone is happier, including the "leader". Had I allowed my ego to stand in the way and not submitted to these guys knowledge and willingness to lead then we most likely we will lose the game this Sunday. So, now I am happy knowing that we are going to win (most likely), and if we don't ... I am not to blame! lol! Just kidding on that last part there... !

My First Time

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Okay so yesterday I went downtown to study for my Sunday sermon. I ended up sitting in the main lobby area of Crown Center that overlooks the Governors Christmas Tree that is going up right now.

After an hour of study and a full Pumpkin Spice latte I needed to use the restroom really really bad. SO I pack up my computer, put in my iPod (listening to some really good teaching) and head to the facilities.

Now, I am sure you know what it is like to have your iPod in (or an mp3 player) … you are vaguely aware of things around you, but only vaguely. So I walk over to the very crowded Westin Crown Center Hotel lobby to use the bathroom (which I’ve used before) and I slip through the throngs of people and slide into the restroom …. vaguely aware.

As soon as I walk in I, vaguely, notice the nice sitting area in the “men’s bathroom” that I had not seen before in a “men’s bathroom” and thought to myself, “Wow, that’s nice … maybe I will sit there after I finishing going to the restroom”. I continue my (vague) journey (still listening to my teaching on iPod) into the “men’s bathroom” and turn another corner and think to myself, “oh, wow no urinals … interesting” so I do the slight lean over to see which stall is available … all are full but one, so I enter … leaving the door open (cause that’s what guys do) and do the classic standing guy pee thing (listening to my iPod teaching about Jesus).

As I am standing there I sense (vaguely) and see (vaguely) beside me and behind me a scurrying of people, fast moving shadows under the stalls … doors opening, closing, slamming, people running out of the bathroom. “mmm odd” I think to myself … “maybe they are all going to the same meeting and they are late”. I finish my business, turnaround to walk out and notice (vaguely) that “huh, I’ve never known of a guy’s restroom to have potpourri, lotions, and other girly stuff on the counters … fancy”

Though I normally wash my hands before leaving the “men’s restroom” I felt that something was amiss and that I should just leave. And when I opened the door to leave there is a crowd of women standing and pointing … at me … the “guy who was in the women’s restroom”.

I didn’t know what to say, but what stammered out through my big sheepy smile “Oh my gosh I was in the women’s restroom” and I put my head down and disappeared through the crowd feeling like all the women were looking and pointing. I even saw several security guards that I knew were looking for me! So embarrassed … my first trip to a women’s restroom!

You got a good story … share!

You Might Be A Racist If ...

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If you didn’t vote for Obama because he is black, you might be a racist.

If you did vote for Obama because he is black, you might be a racist.

Racism [rey-siz-uh m]
The belief that race accounts for differences in human character or ability and that a particular race is superior to others. Discrimination or prejudice based on race.

I believe with all my heart that there is only ONE RACE, and that is the HUMAN RACE!

It Matters

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I love studying Theology, Doctrine and Bible Interpretation … that is not typically what people get excited about. I do believe that the Bible can help us define our life experiences. So it does matter what you and I believe about God, the Bible, and People, etc.

For example; What if you were always taught and you believed that you should “spend all you make … don’t let money burn a hole in your pocket… there will always be more tomorrow” … how would that affect your financial situation?

Some people believe that MORE money simply means MORE to spend … I’ve met many people like that. Then there are people who believe you should “save all you get … store up for a rainy day … there are no guarantees”.

Two different “beliefs” or “views on money”, which is right? I guess for some that may be debatable question. How about I ask it this way; which is the wiser? Probably for those who save save save … spend a little, and for those who spend spend spend … save a little.

So what is it you believe about God, Jesus, Man, Death, Life, the Bible, Life After Death, Meaning of Life, etc.? It matters what you believe because you will LIVE HOW YOU believe … or should I say you SHOULD live how you believe.

Think about it!

What is Happening?

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I woke up this morning thinking about the over-all theme of the Bible; the story of God's love for humanity (you and me) and our falling short of returning the love. You see this clearly in the story of God’s people in the Old Testament. God kept coming through and people would soon forget the one true God and turn to foreign idols.

Honestly, if I can just be forthright here, I see this today in our society and in or churches too! And please, I am not pointing a finger here … I am including me in this conversation.

We are a culture who has in a general sense forgotten God and have turned to idols. And I think it’s for the same reasons the Israelites did it back in their time … God didn’t always ACT in the manor or in the timeframe that THEY wanted, they thought mostly of things in the context of THEIR COMFORT, rather then God’s PURPOSE. And here is the problem with this … just like for the Israelites when they turned away from God it wasn’t good, I believe it is the same for us here today, in America (supposedly a Christian Nation) … Yes, there are many Christians in America, and many Christian leaders, even our current President and President elect our professing Christians … but as a whole, we’ve got some changing to do if we are going to truly see the blessings of God on our Country and the people who make up our beautiful Country.

Sorry to blast you and me this morning … but I hope this blog drives you to your knees in search of the one true God.

Shalom!