The Victim

I was reflecting on a recent interaction I had with one of the neighborhood kids who always plays the victim. He is an only child, a good kid, with good parents, though he is always innocent of others accusations.

There have been numerous occasions I have actually seen him in the act of doing something inappropriate (without his knowledge) … he denies it, blames others, makes excuses, and will even put on some tears of being “picked on”.

This is a common kid situation (if you have kids you understand) but don’t we as adults play the victim from time to time… it just feels better to play innocent, blame others and make excuses. That way we do not have to take ownership of our crap… we can continue to ignore issues.

We get pulled over and get a ticket… the cop was mean we say - forgetting to add we were doing 50 over and nearly ran over an elderly women crossing the street to pick up her new dentures, the boss is just a jerk – but we forget to add we were way under on sales goals and notoriously run 30 minutes late, our spouse is not sexually responsive – yet all we do is sit and watch sports when we get home from a 12 hour workday.

I’ve always appreciated when people have a true or at least honest self concept… they are able to say, “I deserve to be jumped on by my boss… I have been slacking and not working very hard… I needed a good kick in the pants”. “People treat me bad because I am a jerk most the time…”, “I deserved the ticket, I was speeding and could have really caused a bad accident”, “My wife is nagging on me for good reason, and I’m an idiot”.

So, try being brutally honest with yourself…

“You will know the truth, and the truth will make you free” - Jesus