Romans 14:19
“Let us therefore make every effort to do what leads to peace and to mutual edification.”
FIGHT RULES
1) Focus on the PRESENT.
DON’T: Dig up past grievances/sins.
2) Focus on partner’s actions and how those make you FEEL.
DON’T: Criticize your partner’s personality or character.
3) Pick a good TIME to talk.
DON’T: Complain at times when your partner is distracted by pressing matters such as a deadline or caring for small children.
4) Tell your partner about your NEEDS and DESIRES .
DON’T: Expect your partner to mind-read, to guess your needs and desires.
HEALTHY WAYS TO RESPOND
1) Ask QUESTIONS for better understanding.
DON’T: Belittle or criticize your partner for complaining.
2) Acknowledge the LONGING behind your partner’s complaint.
DON’T: Defend yourself.
3) Take RESPONSIBILITY for the problem.
DON’T: Deny responsibility or flip it or spin it back on your partner.
4) Don’t TAP out.
DON'T: Quit.
