Happy New Year!
A new year always brings that feeling of getting to start over, at least for me it does. It's time for a fresh start in so many of the areas I feel I may have fallen short 'last year.' And when I am reminded of my failures I often say, "Oh that was so last year!" And I move on. Hopefully to better and better things. You should to.
This brings me to 'A Relationship with Purpose' ... I woke up this morning and thought what is the magic in a relationship? I mean really?! What is it that makes some work and others fail. Way too many fail, we all know that. No one intends on being "that relationship" do we? No! We start with 'purpose' then we lose focus of the purpose of the relationship. This happens to us all. Even me.
We are all selfish by nature. It's just who we are, BUT we don't have to live from that nature. One of the most important purposes of every relationship is to make it about about we not me. When I walked the aisle and committed myself to Jana I gave up thinking only of myself as I had done for the last 25 years. It's now about us. And I had to think, what's good for her? And I have to confess here, I have failed so many times on this. I still struggle with being selfish. I hate it about myself. It's my struggle.
Another purpose in a relationship, if you have kids, is just that. Creating a happy healthy home for your children to thrive. Yes, I do believe that if marriages were happier and healthier this would lead to better home environments and produce better well adjusted children. Of course kids are going to do what they do no matter what (just like we did when we were kids) but we give them a much better shot in a happy home.
I know for my relationship there's a purpose of helping other couples. I must admit I sometimes feel it as a pressure, I shouldn't, but I do. It's also a challenge. I love challenges. And I consider being in a 21 year infidelity free happy marriage pretty awesome! In this day and age it's almost a bonafide miracle.
So, does your relationship have a purpose? Define it. Talk about it. Write it down. Commit to it. Live to fulfill it. Focus on it. Pray that God helps you stick to it. If you fall down, get back up and move towards it.
You can do it!