Advent 2013 - Week Two: LOVE

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Sunday, December 8, 2013: This is the second Sunday in Advent. Light the first and second candles and read together the following meditation:


FIRST READER: This is the second Sunday in Advent. Today, we light two purple candles. Last Sunday, we lit the candle of hope. This Sunday, we light the candle of love. One verse that many memorize and remember on this day is John 3:16, "God so loved the world..." some people may not know the love of other people. That makes it harder for them to understand God's love. During Advent, we pray that we may remember again God's gift of Jesus to the world and know that God's love for all people is the reason for this gift.

(Light the first and second candles.)


SECOND READER: When we look at the second candle, we remember God's love. When we read the words of the psalmist, we know of God's greatness and care. We remember God's love at Advent when we remember that God sent Jesus to us to help us know that God is loving and just.

FIRST READER: Read Isaiah 11:1-10

DISCUSSION: When we think of God's love, we might not always think of the words of the prophets. But when we read this picture of the peaceable kingdom, we are amazed by God's love that allows a child to lead.

Who are the people in our world who need the message of God's love?
What are our hopes for how people today can receive the message of God's love?
How do we help others know God's love?

PRAYER: Dear God: Thank you for your son, Jesus. Thank you for the words found in our Bible that help us remember your love and care. Help us see how we can bring God's message to the people we meet in our schools, at our jobs, and in our neighborhoods. Help us be messengers of God's love for everyone.

Monday, December 9, 2013: Read again Isaiah 11:1-10. Create a poster by drawing pictures of the wondrous things you see in the world around you that God has created. Create your picture of God's kingdom of peace. Give thanks for the world and all people in the world.

Tuesday, December 10, 2013: Is there someone you know who needs to hear words of God's love? Make or select a card for that person and mail it today.

Wednesday, December 11, 2013: Love is something we need in our church. Think about the people in our church. Select one person in our church. Pray for that person today.

Thursday, December 12, 2013: As we get ready to celebrate again the birth of Jesus, we sometimes get very busy. Today, take a ten-minute break. Sit quietly. If it helps you to concentrate, look at your Advent wreath. Pray, asking God's help to bring quiet and calm to a busy world.

Friday, December 13, 2013: Think about your family. Some may live with you. Others may be far away. Who in your family needs God's love? Pray for this family member today.

Saturday, December 14, 2013: There are people in our neighborhoods, in our church, and in our community who need to know of God's love. Select someone to visit today. Visit by phone or in person. Go as a family or by yourself. It doesn't necessarily have to be a visit to a home. Maybe there is someone who waits on you at the grocery store. Stop by today and talk with that person. Tell the person you visit one way he or she brings peace to you.

How to be an Irresistible Man

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I believe with all my heart that any man, well most any, can be irresistible. I really do believe that. And just like we learned from the movie Hitch with Will Smith as the Date Doctor, it doesn't work if it’s fake. It must be genuine.  If you are simply ‘acting’ irresistible, the wife, girlfriend, etc. will see right through it. Plus who wants to be a fraud or be with a fraud? Not a trait of irresistibility. And if you do want to be a fraud, stop reading this post please!

Now, being irresistible will look different for and to different people. I mean what is ‘irresistible’ to one person may not be ‘irresistible’ to another. So I am going to try and give you a snap shot of the heart behind being irresistible.

irresistible 
1. not able to be resisted or refused;
2. very fascinating or alluring 

I believe it starts with being selfless, at least as much as possible. We are selfish by nature and this is something that flies in the face of what we naturally want to do, but you need to be in control of yourself. But specifically I want to talk about ‘irresistibility’ as it relates to dating relationships, or marriage. How can you, if you are single, be irresistible to the one’s heart you are trying to capture? Or if you are married, how can you be irresistible to your spouse?

And really being irresistible isn't about being irresistible, but about loving someone like crazy! It’s about loving someone so much that they find you irresistible.

  1)      Study them.

So what are your wife’s likes and dislikes? What kind of food does she like? What places would she wish to visit? What smells does she like? What colors does she like? What kind of music does she like to listen to? On and on! Cater to those things!

  2)      Do the little things.

Little things matter! For example last Saturday morning I got up to fix breakfast for the family as I always do, but this time I brought my wife’s breakfast to her in bed.  It’s the little notes, cards, and other little things that make a big difference.

  3)      Make it your life’s mission to serve them. 
      
      If every husband would just go all about in love and service to his wife, I doubt they would complain about not getting any physical lovin from her! Just sayin! Not that that should be the motivation, but it’s true. It’s when we men get selfish that they then begin to get selfish.

  4)      Be romantic. 

       I believe in making even small dates just a touch more romantic with something special. Like one time we simply went out for ice cream and I brought-a-long a candle for the table! We had Ice Cream by candlelight! Everyone else wondered where their candle was! Ha ha!
  
  5)      Make every day a new day. 

      I try to make my wife feel loved, like really loved every day! I want her to feel secure in my love for her. Often when she comes home from a Grocery Store run I grab her and hug and kiss her like she was gone for a week and I missed her! It’s easy to do, but also easy not to do.
  
  6)      Focus on the good. 

      It’s easy to find fault in others. Life is too short for that, I believe! There are faults all around us and to focus on them is just miserable! Now, obviously if they are bad you must deal with them, fix them, get help, etc. I am not saying overlook negative behavior! But often we let the little things ruin so much, when the good is so much better than the bad. Make sense?

  7)      Make it your job to bring them happiness. 

      Adjusting your mindset a bit can help too. Rather than thinking about what ‘they’ need to do to make ‘you’ happy, ask yourself; what can I do to make them happy?  And then deliver. I believe that this works best when both are thinking this way about each other! It sucks if only one is doing this! You get tired of giving, giving, giving, when they just take, take, take!

I also understand that you can’t ‘make’ someone happy! They must be happy, BUT I think that you can contribute to their happiness in what you do, and say.

FINAL THOUGHTS


I think many marriages fail today because we are so selfish. I believe that if men would go all out in crazy selfless love towards their wives we’d have happier homes, because we'd have happier wives! Maybe I am naïve, I've only been married for 20 years, but it’s worked for us so far! There are days I do not feel like doing any of the things I have mentioned here, and I want to be selfish! Ha ha! Trust me, ask my wife! But I know she would tell you that I practice what I preach! She feels super special, super loved, super cherished by me! She knows I am crazy about her - I not only tell her with words, but I show her with action. Way too many wives we've talked to don’t feel this way, and frankly it breaks my heart, because they should! Every wife in the world should feel cherished by their husband just as I believe every husband should be over sexed by their wife!  

Advent 2013 - Week One: HOPE

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FIRST WEEK THEME: HOPE

Sunday, December 1, 2013: Light the first candle on your wreath and read together the following meditation:

FIRST READER: This is the first Sunday in Advent. Today we light one purple candle. This is the candle of hope. Advent is a time of waiting and hoping. We wait for the day when we celebrate again the birth of Jesus. We hope that everyone will come to know God and to worship God.

(Light the first candle)

SECOND READER: When we look at the first candle we remember God's promise. God promised to send a Savior to the people. When we listen to our Scripture reading, we learn what the prophet Isaiah wrote about God. God fulfills the promises made to care for people. God is loving and just. God brings peace. This gives us hope. We look forward to the time when everything is fair, when the world is at peace, and all people are treated justly.

FIRST READER: Read Isaiah 2:1-5

DISCUSSION: This Scripture offers us the hope of God's kingdom where there is peace and has the wonderful sentence, "…let us walk in the light of the Lord!"


Who are the people in our world who need hope?
What are the hopes we have for our world today?
How do we help others know that God gives hope?

PRAYER: Dear God: Thank you for your son, Jesus. Thank you for the words of the Prophet Isaiah that remind us that you are the source of our hope. Help us to remember to walk in the light of the Lord. AMEN


DURING THE WEEK


Monday, December 2, 2013: Today read again Isaiah 2:1-5. Pick one verse and memorize it. How do you think this verse gives hope to people?

Tuesday, December 3, 2013: Is there someone you know who needs to hear words of hope? Make or select a card for that person and mail it today.

Wednesday, December 4, 2013: Hope is something we need in our world. Think about different leaders in the world. Select one world leader. Pray for that world leader today.

Thursday, December 5, 2013: As we get ready to celebrate again the birth of Jesus, we sometimes get very busy. Today, take a ten-minute break. Sit quietly. If it helps you to concentrate, look at your Advent wreath. Pray, asking God's help to bring quiet and calm to a busy world.

Friday, December 6, 2013: Think about your family. Some may live with you. Others may be far away. Who in your family needs God's hope? Pray for this family member today.

Saturday, December 7, 2013: There are people in our neighborhoods, in our church, and in our community who need to know of God's hope. Select someone to visit today. Visit by phone or in person. Go as a family or by yourself. It doesn't necessarily have to be a visit to a home. Maybe there is someone you always see at the library. Stop by today and talk with that person. Tell the person you visit one way he or she helps you feel hopeful.

Kansas City Wedding Officiant

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Did you get engaged over the holidays? Are you looking for someone to officiate your wedding ceremony? If so, give me (Pastor Timmy Gibson) a call! I have over 15 years’ experience, and do approximately 50 weddings a year. I would love to help you make your wedding day perfect!

CONTACT INFO:

Phone: (913) 390-1200
Mobile: (913) 449-2283
Email: jana@mercychurchkc.com
Website: www.mercychurchKC.com/weddings
Facebook: www.facebook.com/timmygibson
Blog: www.timmygibson.com
Twitter: @TimmyKC

REVIEWS:

*****
Pastor Timmy and his wife Jana were a pleasure to work with. Not only were they very responsive, but they made us feel at ease with them. We currently do not belong to a church here in KC but we were looking for our ceremony to be a traditional Christian event. That's exactly what we got with Pastor Timmy, although I feel that he would've worked with us on however we felt the ceremony should go. He was so non-judgemental and I plan to look into his church as soon as all of the post-wedding stuff dies down. I have a feeling we would feel right at home there. - Erica 

*****

Timmy was perfect for our wedding. He was very friendly, very articulate and easy to talk to. My husband and I confided in him with some family issues that have been going on and he was more than willing to talk to us and give us advice. He was a huge hit with our family, he did a great job during our ceremony and everyone in our audience really enjoyed listening to him speak. My husband and I aren't religious but he was very understanding and treated us with the utmost respect. He is a great choice for any couple that hasn't yet found a church or if you just wanted a great speaker! - Michelle

REFERENCES:


Venues

Intercontinental Hotel on the Plaza
Contact: Caterer
(816) 756-1500

Berg Event Space
Contact: Jillian Murphy
(816) 842-4488

Longview Mansion
Contact: Jenny Gale
(816) 761-666

Loch Lloyd
Contact: Michelle Adolphsen
(816) 322-1022


DJ Services

Encore DJ Services
Contact: Danny Goyer
(913) 269-3028


Midlife Crisis

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I am 44, and they say a mid-life crisis happens sometime between ages 40 to 60. I had never giving it much thought until a year ago, and I wouldn't call it a “midlife crisis” for me anyway, but more of a ‘midlife reflection’. I find myself thinking about the future far more than I ever did. Like; what am I doing with my life, how am I making a difference, am I leaving a legacy, things aren't  quit going like I had envisioned (not bad, just not what I thought) I think often about the retirement plan I don’t have, and the kid’s college fund I don’t have. I'm thankful I have a lot of happiness in my life that helps to balance out the things I wish were different.

We have all heard those horror stories of people making crazy decisions during a “midlife crisis” and ruining their life, and the lives of their kids.  And that’s no good! So I guess if nothing else I am blogging this to encourage you who, like me, are in the midst of a “midlife reflection” time, please don’t do anything stupid! Keep your head screwed on straight; keep doing what you know is right. And if you don’t know what is right (common during this time) confide in a trusted level-headed friend to help you not completely throw your life away in the middle of an emotional storm. I would even encourage professional counseling to help talk through the things you are wrestling with if necessary.

Almost every person I talk to who is my age, they are thinking about the same things. So it’s not some tragic time, but rather just a phase in life when you start to realize you aren't 18 anymore, and that you don’t have your whole life ahead of you. Most people in their 40’s have lived over half their life and are thinking, “crap, I better get my sh-- together.”


If you are a young person just getting started in life I can tell you one thing, and that is if you will make plans now for retirement, kid’s college, etc etc. it will save you from much of what I talked about here. The good thing for me is that the things I did invest in in the first half of my life are bringing me great joy today; my marriage, my kids, my faith and living a purposeful life! If I didn't have those things, I am not sure what I would do.

Live life so you will have very few, if any regrets! You'll be glad you did!

Good Grief Another Day

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As many of you know I am blogging some of my experience dealing with the loss of my little sister, Kimberle Rae, who passed away a little more than 3 months ago from the time of this post. And though I am doing good, considering, I still have my occasional moments of sadness, regret, grief, achy-heart, and loss, yet I continue on with life. I must. We must. It would be completely selfish not to. She would want that.

I hesitate to share this, but if you know me you know I am not afraid to tell-all! Ha ha! It’s what makes me me, the one and only. But, I have been going through much of my sister’s stuff in order to help lift the burden from my parents who already have heavy hearts dealing with her death. Many of her things are in boxes in my garage and the other night I decided it’s time to go through it. Much of it I am going to donate to the Safe House for battered women, but all the Hello Kitty Collectibles I am going to sell on e-bay and craigslist. So I bundle up, it’s cold, I go to the garage with a glass of wine and Michael Buble on the iPhone and start going through it all, there is lots of stuff! I come across a pack of her Cigarettes (Marlboro Reds) and I think, “ya know what, I am going to smoke one in memory of my sister” and mind you, I don’t smoke. I mean, I don’t smoke Cigarettes; I smoke Cigars and never inhale. Anyway, picture this in your mind, I find a lighter and light the thing, take a puff and about die of a coughing fit, while holding my glass of wine, a Hello Kitty Purse swinging from my shoulder, a Hello Kitty Bracelet on my wrist, a Hello Kitty Ring on my finger and a pair of Hello Kitty slippers on my feet … ha ha! If only she could see me now! She would have been proud! It ended in tears as I was overcome with emotion over the time I wish I had to spend with her, but can’t.

The space between my sad moments is getting larger and larger, thankfully. I, of course, will never forget her, but the sharpness of the pain is decreasing with each passing day. If I am sad, I let myself go there, unless I am with people who don’t know me. I do not believe that stuffing the emotion is good, but I also do not think it’s good to always live in the sad moments. Does that make sense? I mean there is so much more to my life and even her life than her death. She lived 40 years; there are so many wonderful memories to fill my mind and heart with. Not to mention I have a wife and 2 kids who need their Daddy! And I can’t think of a better way to honor her life than to live life to the full!

I think it’s important when we have a loss of any type to work through it in a healthy way. Don’t build a home there; you can pop up a tent there from time to time, but not a home. Move through it. That is what I am learning; keep moving forward. And sometimes that is a conscious choice, because your feelings want to live there and will live there if you let them. You cannot live by your feelings in this life, and those who do many times wind up behind bars or in a padded room and I don’t want to be in either place.

As I have mentioned before, it is a comfort knowing she is in Heaven that one day we will be reunited. That brings me much peace. You may be reading this having recently faced a loss, I am so sorry! I know it’s hard, and it hurts and sometimes you feel you can’t even breathe. Just keep breathing, keep moving! And if you’d need me and our prayer team to pray for you please let us know – tj@mercychurchKC.com

#1 Wedding Officiant

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I have been recently voted the #1 Wedding Officiant in the Kansas City Area. I guess that’s pretty cool!? I would assume that is why this year I have 50 weddings in my books! That’s almost one a weekend. And 75% are from referral. So, thank you Kansas City!

What I really love about weddings are the couples I get to spend time with in preparation for not only their wedding, but their marriage. I try to help with both, but my main concern is helping couples create a healthy marriage.

If you or someone you know is looking for a pastor to officiate their wedding, please make sure to send them my way!

Website: mercychurchkc.com/weddings

CONTACT INFO
jana@mercychurchKC.com
913.390.1200

Homeless Are People Too

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(This picture was taken by Orin Borgelt on my 5th Homeless Journey)
 
Saturday, September 21st I will embark on my 7th Annual 24/Hr Homeless Journey on the streets of Kansas City. I will be joined, for the first time, by Dr. Dennis Putinski, who is not only a leader at our church but a retiree who has a heart for the homeless.

 
I have been both criticized and praised for my efforts to raise awareness for homelessness. I specifically do it to help the Kansas City Rescue Mission as they prepare for the holiday season as well as the winter season. That is when it is really tough to be homeless, especially here in Kansas City. The criticism does sting, to be honest, I never like being criticized, but obviously I haven’t let it detour me from doing what I feel compelled to do in helping raise awareness for the homeless.

 
I would like to clear a few things up, to help the ‘critics’ understand better, some will never understand hence the reason they are  critical. And after that I will give you the main reason I do this every year. 

 
1)      “This is all a PR stunt.”

Absolutely! That is exactly what it is; I am attempting to raise PUBLIC awareness for the homeless problem in United States and Kansas City! This doesn’t do anything for me personally, or even for the church I pastor! We do not grow one bit from doing this PR stunt! We are a small church of a couple hundred people, have been a couple hundred people for many years. We do not get a single dime for this PR stunt either! It actually cost me personally to do it each year.  

2)      “You are exploiting the homeless.”

In my understanding of what it means to exploit I don’t see how we are “exploiting” anyone. I really don’t. We are not benefiting from this at all. All the benefit is to help the KC Rescue Mission, which in turn helps the homeless. And we are not treating anyone ‘unfairly’ in the process. I could understand this if I was getting something from this, other than sore feet and a crick in my neck.

 
     3)      “You just like being on TV.”

Yes I do, but only because I have a message I believe in! I was invited to be on a big time talk show a few years back about a stupid topic, and I declined! It was more of a Springer type talk show and the content was racy, so I declined. And if I just wanted to be on TV to be on TV, then I would be on TV a lot more often. I like TV only because it gets me in front of more people I can potentially help in some way. And lastly, when we first did this, 7 years ago now, I didn’t notify any news stations, they found out via someone else, and then they requested I send a press release every time I do it so they can run the story.



4)      “It’s not hard to live homeless for one day.”

Of course! It is not at all difficult, I have never said it was a difficult 24 hours. It’s easy really, and honestly it’s fun. Fun because of the stories we hear and the people we meet. I will do this every year until I am unable.

 

WHY I LIVE HOMELESS

 
The bottom line for me is that I am privileged. I would be considered ‘rich’ by most of the world since I make $50,000 a year! You and I know that that doesn’t make me ‘rich’ in the way we think of being rich, but to most of the world’s population it is rich. So living homeless, even for 24 hours, gives me an opportunity to hang around people who are not privileged. People who have nothing but the clothes on their backs and the items in their grocery cart they push around. I on the other hand would need a semi-truck, or two, to hold all my stuff. And living homeless each year helps to remind me how blessed (or lucky) I really am. And how that me being blessed is not just so I can get more ‘stuff’ but so that I can help those who are less fortunate than I am. I believe we are blessed to be a blessing.

 
FOLLOW ME

If you would like to FOLLOW my journey please do so through one of these websites or social networks.

 
Twitter: @TimmyKC

Instagram: TimmyGibsonKC

Personal Facebook: /Timmygibson
 
Church Facebook: /mercychurchKC
 
Website: timmygibson.com
 
Church Site: MercychurchKC.com

Good Grief Continued

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Painting By Tom Matt (www.tommatt.com)
 
It’s been over a month since my sister passed away and time does seem to help heal the hurt a little. I do not believe “time heals all wounds” but it does seem to take away the overwhelming sting of it all. I guess time is like distance, the further you are away from it the harder it is to see, but you still know it’s there off in the distance.
 

Losing someone isn’t something you just ‘get over’ but you ‘get through’ and that is just it, you must get through it, and go through it, because you’ll never ‘get over it’ completely. You’ll always miss that person, and even hurt at times about them being gone. I still miss my sister, and still cry at times about it. But I know that she would want me to go on and live my life to the fullest.
 

There are weird emotions that go on in and around this whole death thing, on one hand you feel obligated to be sad that they are gone because to not be sad or hurt seems to not honor their passing. Almost like, “if I’m not sad, then I don’t miss them or love them.” It’s like when people say, “I worry about you,” it’s almost like they are saying, “I love you, or I care about you.” And to not worry is to not love or care. Maybe it’s the same here, we feel that to not be sad or keep hurting for those who have passed is to not love or care. And maybe we feel to not keep hurting is to forget them? Of course this is not the case! Getting through the pain of losing someone is not forgetting them, it’s really the best way we can remember and even honor them and their life. Living our life well in memory of them is the best gift we can give them and the world we live in.
 

To help me I can only think of what I might want for those who survive me when I die. I want them to miss me, sure! But I do not want them to miss me so much that they cease to live life. I wouldn’t want my family or friends to shut down emotionally, and just cry about my being gone. I hope they would shed a tear, of course, even belly-cry initially, but I would want them to go on. I can honestly say that if I died tomorrow (which I pray I do not!) I would eventually want my wife and very best friend of 20 years to re-marry. Not a month after my passing, lol! But eventually I would want her to find a wonderful man to love her and love my children.  It would  be selfish to wish anything else. And trust me I haven’t always felt this way.

 
WHERE AM I TODAY


I am doing well, and with each day I continue to process through the loss. It’s fascinating that through this whole process I have become, in general, more thankful. I am thankful for each breath I breathe! I find myself thinking, even when things that would normally stress me out, it could always be worse! I am also aware that life is so very precious and I should live each moment with gratitude in my heart!